When it comes to success, I have always stressed the importance of interpersonal skills. In today’s workforce, those employees that can separate themselves by fostering good relationships with those around them are ultimately the most successful the majority of the time. A big part of those skills revolve around knowing how to communicate with others. People talk about communication skills all the time, but what do you really have to do to be successful at it?
The hardest part about knowing how to communicate is that everybody communicates differently, and you must learn how to do it affectively with all types of people. Our personalities and our environment shape our perception, and affect how we interact with others. You have to learn how to get through to people in the way that works best for them. Too often we get caught up in our own communication style that we completely ignore the audience. Instead of getting our point across, we end up alienating them. Like most things in life, the better you get at understanding the needs of others, the more you can meet your own.
For some people, the direct approach is the best way to communicate. I know that I am definitely one of those people, as I appreciate when people tell me things straight up. I have pretty thick skin and I would rather someone be a little harsh as long as it’s honest. I don’t like to hear a lot of niceties if it just means that I have to try to decode them later. I think a big part of it is that I’m so strapped for time nowadays that I don’t want to waste any of it, even if it means hearing something that I might not really want to hear. For others however, they feel much differently. Some people put more emphasis on how you say something than what you’re actually saying. So if you happen to raise your tone or speak to them in a condescending way, they may not be responsive at all and you risk your message not even being heard.
So how do you tell which way you should communicate? Honestly, it’s a learning process. You should communicate initially in the method that you feel the most comfortable with, and over time adjust to the personalities of your audience. The truly effective communicators are those that can read their audiences’ mood and reactions and adjust to their personalities. What makes a person great at this is when those they are interacting with feels as if they truly understand them and know what is important to them. That is why those that can master the art of communication end up being so successful in the long run. The more people that you can foster those great relationships with, the better network of contacts you’ll contain. Over time having the right contacts is what can catapult you to great heights, and it all starts with taking the time to understand your audience.
